Thursday, March 01, 2007

Sick Peanut

Well, it has finally happened to me. I've only heard about it in passing as a blip on a sidebar, whispered between laughing strangers. Not that it's a laughing matter, but damn ...

Isn't E. coli food poisoning supposed to happen to ravenous kids at burger joints who can't tell the difference between fromage and frottage?

I woke up this morning with stomach-splitting-cramps. The next thing you know, I'm flushing large quantities of blood down the toilet. MArt, worried, told me to go to the university health clinic. He's been checking up on me since: visiting me before class, calling afterwards, buying me groceries and sleeping over. (You know, the kind of stuff that would make a Gilmore Girl wet.)

I had originally thought it was my unpredictable dietary habits that were the cause. Since winter arrived a few months ago, my fridge has been stocked with two blocks of cheese, some old eggs, and a can of whipped cream. When I do buy groceries, I unload them at MArt's. My mom told me to force myself to eat at designated times: "Don't start eating only when you feel hungry."

But my well-being tends to be an after-thought, usually when I've already succumbed to something a strong immune system would've beaten. My health plays second fiddle to my academic schedule; sleep is time I could be using to complete an essay. I routinely binge and starve because I habitually postpone what I deem as avoidable activities, like food and rest. (Although paradoxically, I will never pass up the chance to taste test new restaurant offerings.) Illness tends to roll off my back because I always feel like I can get over it - I'm a young girl of 20, a time of excellent virility! (Silly, I know.) Except on this day, the pain erupted suddenly and without notice - I was shaking and sweating from the agony. And it was agony - no hyperbole here. It definitely wasn't something I could just "get around to" later.

I've been taking antibiotics my doctor prescribed (total cost: $3.40) and chugging Boost meal replacement drinks. My lower abdomen is a bit swollen and hurts when it is pressed, so I don't have much of an appetite - nothing I can keep down anyway. My stomach hurts in waves - growing and subsiding, coming and going.

It's funny this has happened to me because I used to cook at home like a madwoman. Trying new recipes and blowing smoke up my own ass over how well they turn out. But these winter months have been awful to me. Since I've moved to a much more convenient neighbourhood, I find myself less motivated to get some much-needed sun. And I know when I don't get my vitamin D, my performance sinks in proportion to the mercury reading. So there you have it: I'm a diseased leper who's a hop, skip, and a slip away from being discovered rotting in the tub by neighbours complaining about the smell.

So let this be a lesson to me: Start being normal.

No comments: