Tuesday, April 06, 2004

I'm learning Japanese. Don't ask me why.

Then again, me being mistaken for Japanese every single time I meet someone new is probably the reason.

I now can say, "Kon'nichi wa. Hajimemashite. Chuugoku-jin desu. Doozo yoroshiku, Suzuki-san." I still can't say "Watashi wa *insert name*" That's sort of weird. The example they give me is "Jason Miller" which is translated to "Jeson Miraa."

Did my Concordia English test. It was the SATs, without the math. Holy crap, I'm so illiterate. What the fuck's a drowess?! Anyway, I did a total of, I believe, 180+ grammar, vocabulary, comprehension questions, 15 current events questions (which I breezed through) and an essay question (one paragraph, really.)

My grammar's terrible! I mean, I was so confused on the test. Some questions were so easy, then looking back, they were hard (or vice versa). My brain was fried by the end of the day; it was terrible! I wanted to slap someone (most of all, me.)

And there's Math Judas bragging (okay, telling me) about getting accepted into Western's Richard Ivey School of Business ("Best program in Canada, biatch!") when I get home. When I teasingly called him Mr. 98%, he replied, "No, it really wasn't the average that did it. Ok, you had to have over 90, but after that, it doesn't matter."

AHHHH! Over 90%?! The last time I had that kind of an average was in grade 10, and that might even been overshooting it! I'm an utter waste of the earth's resources! *Breathe* Marks don't matter, marks don't matter ... Marry rich doctor, marry rich doctor ...

I feel like a temporary blip on the success radar. Everyone's getting early acceptance (okay, by everyone, I mean - shit - yeah, pretty much everyone) and I'm just this poor Mary Jane Loser waiting by the mailbox for her letter of acceptance. I'm that widow standing by the oceanside cliff, tinted by the sunset, sea captains never return for. I'm the dog you leave at the pound. I'm the sad bloke who sits at home eating Quaker oats, channel surfing and *gasp!* enjoying Will & Grace *shudder*

Oh pity me! It is a monstrosity! I'm a failure in the truest sense of the word: One who deserves it.

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